Doom for Earth and Explody Things!
by Invader Mat
Summary: This is my first (decent) fic.A new Invader comes to earth to help zim and thinks of a plan but you just can't find good uranium these days!Will Mat,my fancharacter,ever make anything of himself?Probably not,but read anyway!
1. Invader Mat Arrives!

Matthew S.Invader Mat  
  
Disclaimer:I don't own Zim.  
  
::Zims Base::  
Zim:When I called for reinforcements I had no idea it would take this LONG!  
Gir:I Like BEANS!  
Zim:O.o  
Computer:Irken vootrunner closing in,prepare for landing.  
Zim:Finally!  
::4.7 ft. male irken with purple eyes walks in::  
Mat:Invader Mat reporting for duty!  
Zim:Finally you're here.What took you so long?  
Mat:Well....it's a long story that involves fish paste,toilet paper,and a racoon.  
Zim:(O.o)Well....at least you're here and I didn't get some 3rd rate invader.Aren't you the one who blew up planet vort?  
Mat:Actually...that was invader Matt.  
Zim:HUH?  
Gir:I Like BEANS!  
Mat & Zim:O.o  
Mat:Mines not too great either.Meet Z.I.R.  
::Mat pulls Z.I.R. from apparently nowhere::  
Z.I.R.:Who Likes BEANS????  
Gir:I DOOOOOOOO!  
::Zir And Gir run down the street doing who cares::  
Audience:WE DO!  
Me:SHUT UP!  
Later in court....Judge:Talking to the audience 1 count and physical abuse to fish paste,toilet paper and a racoon 1 count.What do you have to say for yourself.  
Me:How DARE you envoke my wrath,for I am the author.Judges head explodes and I walk home BECAUSE I'M THE AUTHOR!  
  
Thats it for the introduction of invader Mat.EventuallyI will post stories with Invader Mat.(More coming soon)P.S.I fixed the mistakes! 


	2. The Plan!

At Zims base....  
Mat:I think I have the perfect plan to take over earth!  
Zim:You just won't give up on that toilet paper one huh?  
Mat:No....this ones even better!  
Zim:::SIGH::What is it now?  
Mat:Do you remember how you took all the water from Earth once to drench Dib?  
Zim:So?  
Mat:Well,I discovered that water is also the humans weakness!If they don't have it for three days,they die!  
Zim:Good so far,but how can we use this knowledge?  
Mat:I propose that we use the same technology you used to drench Dib to hold all Earths water for ransom!  
Zir:Awww...master loves Zimmy!  
Mat & Zim:SHUT UP!  
Zim:Thats incredible,I can't believe I thought of it!  
Mat:::DEATH GLARE::Who thought of the plan?  
Zim:::SIGH::You did.  
(a/n:Zim sighs a lot!)  
Mat & Zim:::CACKLE INSANELY::  
At Dibs house....  
Dib:I just know Zims up to something and with that Mat guy around they might actually come up with a good plan!  
Gaz:SHUT UP DIB!I'll get you someday zombie hog!!!!!  
At Zims base.....  
Zim:I will be ready to begin my doom tomorow!!!  
Mat:Your doom???  
Zim:::SIGH::  
  
Mat:Thats it for chappy 1!r&r! 


	3. Uranium And Dib!

At Zims Base....  
Zim:It seems I am missing a uranium core!I need it for my amazing plan!  
Mat:::DEATH GLARE::  
Zim:::SIGH::  
Mat:Let's go to the space station and look for one.  
Meanwhile at Dibs House.....  
Dib:Dad,come with me just this once!I'll prove to you that they are aliens!  
Prof:OK,just this once but I'm telling you,I really don't like you sneaking around peoples houses!  
Dib:::Victory Dance::Yay!  
::Dib and Prof walk to zims Base::  
Dib:Ahhh....they're gone!  
Prof:My poor insane son!  
::Professor walks away::  
Dib:NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!  
At the Space Station....  
Mat:I know there's one in here somewhere!  
Zim:Hmmmmm...didn't I see one yesterday?  
Mat:Let's just take the one from the broken containment chamber!  
Zim:Oh....I guess so.  
::Walks over to broken chamber.Zim presses a small purple button and a pink glowing cylinder pops out of the base of the chamber.  
Zim:Got it!  
::Zir & Gir come running through the teleporter with chocolate bubblegum Brainfreezies!  
Gir & Zir:Want some?  
::Gir & Zir splash brainfreezie all over everything.::::BOOM::  
Zim:Oh no...My uranium core!  
At Dibs House....  
Dib:I just have to get a picture of Zim or Mat!If I wait until the weekend is over they might have a plan ready!  
  
Will Dibby get his picture?Will Mat and Zim get their uranium core?Will they survive school?Find out in coming chapters!r&r! 


	4. Dib Gets In...But For How Iong?

Mat & Zim sat on magenta chairs in the clean side of the space station....  
Mat:I really did like the the toilet paper one.  
Zim:That one needed a uranium core too!  
Mat:I think we should finish this in the morning.We can get up early but I need to sleep if a want to keep the little amount of sanity I have left during school!  
Mat & Zim walk away.....  
At Dibs House.....  
Dib:::Leans out window and sees the odd glowing house of ZIM::I need to go out tonight!  
::Gaz stares intently at the game screen in front of her.::  
::Dib grabs a bag by his couch and runs off to the house::  
Dib:The gnomes arent activated!I guess Zim thought I wouldn't sneak in again!  
(A/N:Zim just forgot.)  
::Dib walks in and sees Gir & Zir on the couch watching the deactivated television::  
Gir:Hi big head!  
Dib:MY HEADS NOT BIG!  
Zir & Gir:YES IT IS!(say incredibly fast)  
Zir:Master told me not to turn the tv on at night!Gir can I have a BEAN!  
::Gir hands Zir a bean and Zir eats it in an instant making horrible smacky noises::  
Dib:Gir where are Mat & Zim!  
Gir:Shhhhh.....this is the good part!  
Dib:Where are they!  
Zir:Sleeping on the space station....now shut your horribly large head that is bloated and swollen and all other words that mean big!  
Dib:MY HEADS NOT NOT BIG!  
Zir & Gir:YES IT IS!(say incredibly fast)  
::Dib hops in the trash can but his horribly large head gets stuck for an instant::  
::Dib runs past all kinds of strange flashing consoles and STUFF!Then he hops in the teleporter::  
Dib:What happened here?::Stares at all the pink goo covering the station::  
  
Will Dib get his picture?Will Mat keep a little sanity?WHAT ABOUT THE URANIUM CORE?And how long will I drag this out?Find out in the next chapter!r&rPlease Review!This chapter made up for the lack of Dib!Sorry Dib fans but I'm on Zims side!Hope ya like it! 


	5. Dibs Pictures.....If You Can Call It Tha...

On the Space Station.....  
Dib:Hmmmmm....This pink stuff reminds me of something.  
::Dib picks up a little goo off a nearby console and sniffs it::  
Dib:Nope,definetly not what I thought.  
::FLASHBACK::  
::Dib is standing outside Zims house looking through the window::  
Mat:Mwahahahahaha....soon toilet papery vengance will be MINE!  
::The living room is filled with strange equipment.Mat puts a roll of toilet paper on a metal rod,inserts a glowing pink cylyndrical object into a slot,and connects two electrodes to it::  
::ZAP!!!!The room is covered in pink goo::  
Mat:I really like the toilet paper one!::Sniffle::  
::END FLASHBACK::  
Dib:Nope definetly not.  
::Dib walks around various consoles for a while until he sees a magenta door with the irken logo on it::  
Dib:This is it!  
::Dib walks up to the door::  
Computer:Please enter password!  
::Giant keyboard THING-A-MA-BOB pops out of the ceiling::  
Dib:Okay...I can do this!  
::Types the word "DOOM"::  
Computer:Password incorrect!Intruder is present!  
::Alarms go off.Dib runs at the door but stumbles over a hidden button and the door opens.Dib runs in,snaps his camera wildly,and runs off.::  
At Dibs house....  
::Dib loads the pictures onto his computer.::  
Dib:AHHHHHHHHHHH!The flash didn't go off!School is tomorrow!We're DOOOOOOOMED!  
  
Morning at Zims Space Station....  
Mat:::YAWN!::I fell great!  
Zim:(Drowsy)5 more minutes!Please 5 more minutes!You do love me cold unfeeling robot arm?DON'T YOU?::Cries::  
Mat:WAKE UP!  
Zim:I FEEEEEEEL mIsErAbLe!What did you expect!  
Mat:We might be late for school if you don't get up!  
::Mat & Zim walk through teleporters::  
Mat:Since I've only been here since Saturday and I haven't left the house,I need a disguise!  
::Mat walks up to where the vootcruisers are kept::  
Mat:I WANNA BE A MONGOOSE!HEEHEE!  
::Oval things close over him and he is wearing a stupid mongoose outfit::  
Mat:I was joking!::Throws away disguise::I like that one!  
::The ovals surround him once again and now he has a disguise identical to zims::  
Mat:IT'S GENIUS!  
::Mat walks down to the base::  
Zim:Let's go!  
  
OOOOOOOO.....suspense!That's it so far!r&r! 


	6. School And That Annoying Little Girl!

Outside Zims Base....  
Mat:So.....exactly how bad is this "School"?  
Zim:No one can explain it in words.  
Mat:Oh.  
One Hour Later When First Period is About to Begin......  
Mat:::SHUTTERS::Ewwww....there so.....not....ummmm...pleasant!  
Zim:Yes,yes,that's fascinating!  
Mat:Zim?  
Zim:::SNORES::What,what?Is it starting?  
Mat:Yes.  
Dib:Awwww...come on!You don't seriously think Mat is human do you?  
Everyone:::DROOLS::  
Dib:Awww.....dang!  
Mat:::Sticks toungue out::  
Mrs.Bitters:There will be NOOOOOO sticking out of toungues in this class!Mat DETENTION!::Looks over::Oh....you were doing that to Dib.Forget about what I just said!Ummmm....DIB DETENTION!  
Dib:What did I do?  
Mrs.Bitters:I DOOOOOON"T like YOU!  
Mat:HeeHee!  
Mrs.Bitters:Mat DETENTION ONCE AGAIN!  
Mat:Grrrrr....  
At Recess.....  
Mat:How DARE that human put a penalty on a SUPEIRIOR IRKEN INVADER!::Slaps hands over mouth realizing what he said::  
::Fortunately only one person notices::  
Strange Girl:Gee.....you two really are aliens!  
Zim:(Under Breath)Nice going Mat!  
Mat:(Under Breath)Shut It!  
Strange Girl:You can call me Patti!.....Can I come over your house tomorrow?  
Zim:(Under Breath)Maybe we should erase her memory.  
Mat:(Under Breath)No....people would get suspicious....let's play along and do away with her at the base.  
Zim:(Under Breath)Okay.  
Mat:Of course you can come over little girl!How about 3:45 this afternoon!  
Patti:Okay!I always wanted to meet real aliens!  
Later at Detention....  
Mat:Write it 1,000,000,000 times!?!?!?!?  
Mrs.Bitters:YES!  
Mat:I know!::Pulls out laser and presses a few buttons.ZAP!The words are engraved in the chalk board.Mat walks away and Mrs.Bitters just stares::  
At the Base (3:45)....  
Patti:IM HEEEERE!  
Zim:Oh darn!I hate that little girl!  
Patti:::Walks in::OOOOOOO.....  
Mat:Ready?  
Zim:Yeah.  
Patti:::Walks up to Mat & Zim::You are so cute!Dib sent me your pictures!  
Mat:He has our pictures?  
Patti:Not exactly....he drew the pictures.  
Mat:Let me see them.  
Patti:K!::She hands Mat the pictures::  
Mat:Wow!These are really good!  
Zim:Don't say anything!  
Mat:She's kind of nice!Maybe she should be our friend.  
Mat & Zim:NAHHHHHH!  
::Zim pulls out a huge laser and zaps the little girl.She lays unconscious now.Zim presses another button and the unconscious girl is teleported away.::  
Mat:Where did you send her?  
Zim:Oh....someplace very suitable.  
Meanwhile at the Bottom of the Atlantic Ocean...  
Patti:What happened?::AUGHHHHH!!!!Patti is eaten by a shark right before we would have gotten to see her head implode...Darn::  
Back at Zims Base....  
Zim:Yes...someplace very suitable....  
Mat:I just got a great idea!Why don't we steal the uranium from Prof.Membrane tonight?  
::A devilish grin spreads across Zims face::  
  
Wow...my longest chapter!This story will be very dragged out with various attempts at uranium cores and pictures!Hope ya like it!r&r!Please Review!This is my greatest chapter!!!!!:-)P.S.I fixed the mistakes! 


	7. Patti Returns!

At The Bottom Of The Atlantic Ocean....  
Patti:I always wanted to meet a real shark before!  
Shark:Grrrr....  
::The shark swims to the surface and spits Patti onto a pirate ship::  
Patti:Wow!I always wanted to meet real pirates before!  
Meanwhile At Zims Base.....  
Mat:It's time to go to Dibs house for the core!  
Zim:Yeah!  
::Mat & Zim walk off to Dibs house::  
Back On The Pirate Ship(1 Hour Later)....  
Patti:You're sooooo cute!  
::The pirates shoot Patti out of a cannon and she lands in Prof.Membranes' lab::  
At The Lab......  
Mat:I can't beleive we got in!!!  
Zim:I CAN!PATHETIC Ummmm.....ALL HUMANY.....Ummmmm...SCIENTIST THINGY!  
Mat & Zim:Wahahahahahah!!!!  
::Patti walks out into the open::  
Mat & Zim:AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!  
Patti:Aww....you missed ME!!!!!  
Mat:What do we do now???  
::Patti is distracted by a pink glowing cylinder::  
Patti:OOOOOO.......  
Mat & Zim:NOOOOOO!!!  
::Patti picks up the cylinder and licks it::  
Patti:It must be GUMMMMMM!  
::Before anyting can be said Patti breaks open the cylinder and it explodes causing her to fall unconscious.Luckily,Mat and Zim were too far away and didn't get knocked unconscious.Mat and Zim run back to the base......Dib runs in::  
Dib:I know your'e here!::Snaps camera wildly::  
::When the smoke clears Dib sees Patti::  
Dib:Are you alright?::Picks up Patti::Ahhhhhhhh!!!It's the strange girl from school!!!::Dials 911::  
1 Hour Later.....  
General:Thanks Dib....we've been looking for her for so long!Unfortunately,she is too dangerous and she must be dealt with.  
::BOOM::  
At The Base.....  
Zim:Did you hear that?  
Mat:Yeah!Thank gosh she's gone!  
Zim:Phew!  
At Dibs House...  
Dib:I know!I'll set up a camera with a fake uranium core!Since they yelled when Patti ::Shudders:: took the core,they must need one!Mahahahahahaha!!!!!  
  
WEEEEEEHOOOOO!!Will Dib actually try to get a picture again?Will Mat & Zim get their core?I SURE HOPE PATTI IS GONE FOR GOOD!Whoooo...that was weird!r&r!Please Review! 


	8. Dib Just Doesn't Know When To Give Up!

At Dibs House.....  
Dib:This is going to be SOOOOO easy!  
::Dib takes a medium sized fuse and paints it pink.Then he puts a small camera behind it.::  
Dib:Mahahahahaaaaa!!!!  
At Zims Base.....  
Mat:Hey Zim.....I just saw dib with a uranium core!  
Zim:Oh boy...you spend too much time staring out the window and you don't even have your disguise onnnnn....WHAT DID YOU SAY!?!?!?!?!  
Mat:DIB HAS A URANIUM CORE!  
Zim:GREAT!We'll steal it tonight after school.....it will be easy!!!  
Mat & Zim:Mahahahaha!  
At Zims Base (10 hours later after horrible dooming at school)......  
Mat:I think were ready!  
Zim:He must have staged it though....we'll have to be very careful...HOLD ON!Iv'e got an excelent idea!!  
Mat:I hope it's better than your last one!  
Zim:WHO'S THE COMMANDING OFFICER!?!?!?!?!  
Mat:I thought I was.....  
Zim:Oh...  
::Mat & Zim walk off to Dibs house::  
Mat:I see it!  
::Zim looks over and sees the "core" and Dibs camera::  
Mat:Ha!...thats pathetic!  
::Mat & Zim take the core and the camera snaps pictures of them::  
In The Morning At Dibs House.....  
Dib:I can't wait to see these pictures!  
::Dib holds up the disk.Dib loads the pictures into his computer.::  
Dib:Nooooooo!They were wearing their disguises!  
At Zims Base...  
Mat:I have the core!Are you ready?  
Zim:Yes!  
::Mat &Zim walk through the cylindrical teleporters to the space station.Zim presses a button on a huge machine and a tray pops out.::  
Zim:Mat,insert the core!  
::Mat puts the "core" in the tray.The tray retracts.......BOOM!::  
Zim:Oh no...it wasn't a uranium core...this should set us back about 2 months!  
::A huge pipe falls from the ceiling and knocks Mat and Zim unconscious::  
  
Wooooo!That was fun!Hope ya liked it!Please Review!I haven't been getting any reviews!::Sniffle::r&r! 


	9. A Contract And Dibs Party!

At Zims Base (Friday,nothing interesting happened yesterday).....  
Mat:I still have a bruise from Wednesday!  
Zim:::Looks at Mat through a black eye::I can't feel my face....  
Mat:::Sits on couch::I think it's time for another amazing plan from ME!::Whispers to Zim::  
Mat & Zim:Mahahahahaha.....!  
Later In School At Gym....  
Mat:What kind of awful human torture is this?  
Zim:I guess the adults just like to torture their children.  
Mat:Ooooooo....neat...but painful.  
10 Minutes Later.....  
Mat:Please Mr.Blabskatz,just a 5 minute break!?!?!?!?  
Mr.Blabskatz:DROP AND GIVE ME TWENTY!  
Mat:::Whispering::This is awful....now they want my money!::Pulls out communicator.Whispers.::Remind me to get revenge on the human "Gym Teacher"!  
Later At Lunch....  
::Mat is sitting at a table next to Dib and Zim just has a devious grin on his face::  
Mat:::Whispers::Dib,I'm going to make you an offer you can't refuse....  
Dib:Give it up ALIEN!  
Mat:::Ignoreing Dib::.....Zim is an intergalactic fugitive,Dib.I want to stop him as much as you do.  
Dib:And I'm supposed to believe that!?!?!?!?  
::Mat holds out a piece of paper::  
Mat:Sign next to the X.  
::Dib absent mindedly does it::  
Mat:Mahahahahahaaaaaaa!  
::Everyone stares::  
Mat:::Cough.Cough.::  
Dib:You tricked me!  
Mat:No...you were just stupid not to question me further!  
::Dib walks away perplexed::  
Later At Zims Base....  
Mat:Ha!Now I have a signed agreement that Dib will stay off the premisis of the base!I think I'll add a few things!::Whiile Writing::I.....Dib....will...wear,.....every....Friday...a....HEY!!!  
::The paper is ripped away by Zir::  
Zir:Whatsit!!!!  
Mat:Give that back!It's very important!  
::Gir walks up::  
Gir:Pretty!::Spills brainfreezie all over it::  
Mat:NOOOO!You dunce!  
Zir:I only wanted to help....::Cries::  
Mat:::Sigh::I'm not mad!NOW GO AWAY!  
::Gir and Zir walk away::  
Mat:What am I going to do now?  
Zim:I don't know.  
The Next Day At Zims Base....  
Mat:Zim...::Holds up envelope::...I found this outside the door!  
Zim:What is it?  
Mat:I dunno!  
Zim:Well.....open it!  
Mat:Oh....::Rips open envelope::It says we're invited to DIBS birthday party!P.S.My father is making me invite everyone,don't come!  
Zim:Let's go just to upset Dib!  
Mat:Sure...  
::Mat and Zim walk off to the lab to work on their "gifts"::  
Outside Dibs House(The party just began).....  
Mat:Ready?  
Zim:Yup!HeeHee!  
::Mat and Zim walk in and place their "gifts" on the table::  
Zim:::Walks up to Dib::We came just to annoy you,Dib.Nice hat,NOT!Hahaaaaa!  
Dib:That's my fathers fault too!  
Mat:::Walks up::Awww...Dibbys daddy made him wear a stupid hat!  
30 Minutes Later.....  
Mat:Open my present now!  
Dib:I *guess* so.::Opens an eerie purple package::Ahhhhh!It's....A subscription to U.F.O.'s weekly?  
Mat:What can I say?I'm a nice guy!  
Zim:Really...what did you do to it?  
Mat:Nothing!  
Zim:Sometimes I question your sanity.  
Mat:Me too.  
Dib:I might as well get this over with.::Opens an eerie green package::Ahhh!Bath soap?Allright what did you do to this stuff?  
Mat:I didn't do anything.Zims soap is probably poison or something though.  
1 Hour Later At Zims Base...  
Zim:Come on Mat....what did you do to Dibs gift?  
Mat:Nothing!  
Zim:0.oI can't wait until Dib tries his "soap"!  
Mat:HeeHee!  
Meanwhile At Dibs House...  
::Dib is in his bathroom.Dib puts Zims "soap" by the bathtub.When the tub is ready,he absent mindedly adds the "soap".Then he gets in.::  
Dib:Ahhhhh!The soap,it burns!  
Back At Zims Base...  
Mat:Ahhh...the sweet smell...or sound...of revenge!Zim....doesn't that "soap" do anything else?  
Zim:Nope!  
Mat:0.o  
  
This was my longest chapter ever!I hope you liked it and PLEASE REVIEW!Strange huh?r&r! 


	10. Kidnapped!

At Zims Base (Saturday).....  
Mat:I can't believe you didn't do anything else to Dib!You could have killed him and you missed the chance!  
Zim:Don't rub it in!  
Mat:Anyway...how's the plan going?  
Zim:Actually,it's doing quite well!We're only back one month!  
Mat:Oh gee...we're a whole month back!  
::Zir & Gir walk in having heard the conversation::  
Zir:I like months!There pretty,especially the blue ones!  
Gir:I wanna brainfreezie!  
Zir:Meeeeeeeee too!  
Mat:Okay,just one more!Those things are clogging your artificial inteligence chips!  
Zir:Hee...artificial!  
::Zir & Gir walk off to buy brainfreezies::  
Mat:Oh no...they forgot their disguises!  
Dib:::outside the door::Ha!I've got your little robots now!Just wait and see what will happen to them!::Dib takes a camera and snaps a picture of Zim,then runs off::  
Mat:What do we do?  
Zim:I know!  
At Dibs House....  
Zir:Are we there yet,big head?  
Dib:MY HEADS NOT BIG!  
Zir & Gir:Yes it is!(Say incredibly fast)  
Dib:Oh no!  
::Dib gets home,puts the cage Zir and Gir are in on the table,loads the picture into the computer and erases it from the camera::  
Dib:HA!See Zim escape me now!  
::Zir slips through the way to far apart bars on the cage,walks up to the computer and eats the hard drive out of the computer::  
Dib:You didn't think THAT was the only copy did you?I have a copy on my VST hard drive!....Hey!How did you get out?  
Zir:VST?Does that stand for Very Special Taco?OOOOOO...it must!  
::Gir slips through the bars,comes to the computer and eats the VST hard drive sitting next to it::  
Gir:It doesn't taste like a taco!  
Zir:That's cuz it's special!  
Gir:OOOOO!  
Dib:NOOOOOOOOO!This can't be!  
::Zir and Gir walk out the front door and back to Mat and Zim:  
Zim:Thank gosh you're back!My plan kinda....sorta....exploded.  
Mat:What about the picture?  
Zir:OOOOOO...it was tasty!  
Mat:(o.0)At least it's gone!  
Zim:Ya!Stupid Dib-human!  
Mat & Zim:Muahahahahahaaaaa!  
Zir & Gir:HEEEEHEHEHEHEHEEEEEEHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!  
Back At Dibs House....  
Dib:They're gone too!AHHHHHHH!::Dib falls on the ground and starts writhing::  
  
That was strange!I LIKE STRANGE!HEEHEE!Hope ya liked it!Please Review!r&r! 


	11. Mats Plan Thingies!

At Zims Base(Sunday morning).....  
::Mat and Zim are seen sleeping in a magenta room on the space station::  
Mat:::Wakes up::Zim,get up!  
Zim:::Still asleep::No my tallest,I cannot accept a class 2 mission!I'm far beyond those!  
Mat:Hate to wake ya,class 1 mission boy,but we've got STUFF to do!  
Zim:::Wakes up::YOU HEARD THAT!?!?!?!?  
Mat:You talk in your sleep and it doesn't help that your bed is right next to mine!  
Zim:What is it that your absolutely dying to do today anyway?  
Mat:Oh....you'll see!  
Zim:Awwww...tell me!  
Mat:It involves Dib!That's all I'm telling you now!  
At Dibs House(30 min. later).....  
Dib:::Asleep in his bedroom::Oh no Mr.President,I couldn't accept the Nobel prize....::Wakes up::AHHHHHH!  
::Mat is sitting on Dibs windowsill.Mat falls out the window::  
Mat:AHHHHHH!  
Director:Take two!  
::Mat is sitting on Dibs windowsill::  
Mat:What is the Nobel prize anyway?  
Dib:YOU HEARD THAT!?!?!?!....What are you doing in my window?  
Mat:I was serious about Zim being a fugitive.  
Dib:Really?  
Mat:No.....::Mat pulls out a laser and zaps Dib unconscious.Mat walks back to the base::Zim....what should we do now?I sort of....ran out of ideas.....!  
Zim:Too bad the containment chamber is broken...  
::While Mat and Zim are talking,Dib wakes up,goes home and activates his security system::  
Mat:Oh no....we were so close...I feel so stupid!  
Zim:You should!  
Mat:HEY!Anyway...I've got another idea!  
Zim:Not again!  
1 Hour Later...  
::The livingroom is filled with the same equipment from Dibs flashback::  
Mat:I can't fail now!I'm going to use plutonium!  
::Mat puts a roll of toilet paper on a metal rod,inserts a glowing blue cylyndrical object into a slot,and connects two electrodes to it.....ZAP::  
Mat:I've got to give up on this!  
Zim:Yup!  
  
Okaaaaaay....I'm not right today.Well....anyway....hope ya liked it!Please Review!r&r! 


	12. Failed Plans And Dibs Dissapointments!

At Zims Base(Sunday Night).........  
Mat:What am I going to do now?::Mat pulls out a red notebook::  
Zim:What's that?  
Mat:It's a list of my failed plans.  
Zim:Oh...  
Mat:Should I put the capture Dib one in here too?  
Zim:Yeah.....  
Mat:This is kinda depressing.  
::Zim leans over Mats' notebook and reads weasel stretcher,toilet paper,capture Dib....::  
Zim:That's not too many!  
::Mat turns the page and Zim sees about 100 plans.Then Mat flips the page again and again and again....::  
Mat:It's not all bad though!::Mat pulls out a green notebook::  
Zim:What's that?  
Mat:A list of successful plans.  
::Zim takes the notebook and opens it::  
Zim:There's nothing here!?!?!?!?  
Mat:Exactly!  
Zim:What's better about that?  
Mat:Ummmm...well.....it kind of......you see......?I DUNNO!?!?!?!  
Out In The Bushes By The Base......  
Dib:I can't hear anything!?!?!?Hey...that looks like a journal!I could steal it tonight and find out his weakness!  
Gaz:Why did dad make me come with you?  
Dib:Come on...just look....they're aliens!  
Gaz:I really don't care!  
Back In The Base.....  
Mat:We batter go to bed if we want to live through torture tomorrow.  
Zim:I guess so.  
::Mat puts his notebooks on the end table and walks off to bed::  
Out In The Bushes.....  
Dib:Lets go!  
Gaz:I should gat payed for this!  
Dib:Come on...this is the fate of the world!  
Gaz:Stealing a notebook???  
Dib:TWO notebooks!  
Gaz:Does that make a difference?  
Dib:What?  
Gaz:Grrrr....  
::Dib walks into Zims base and Gaz just sits down and turns her gameslave on::  
Dib:Yes....I'm so amazing!  
::Dib grabs the notebooks and stuffs them in his shirt.Alarms go off.::  
Computer:SECURITY BREACH!  
::A trap door opens under Dib and he is catapulted out the door and back to his house::  
1 Hour Later.....  
Dib:I can't wait to read this!::Holds up notebook::Let's see....weasel stretcher,toilet paper,capture Dib.....What is this?Some kind of alien grocery list?::Flips pages::AUGHHHH....that's all this is!Wait...I still have the other notebook!EMPTY!?!?!?WHY MEEEEE!?!?!?!?::Falls on the ground and starts writhing(again)::  
Gaz:OOOOOO...I like this!  
  
This makes up for the short chapter earlier!Hope ya liked it!r&r! 


	13. The Beginning Of An Idiot Cruise!

At Zims Base(Monday)....  
Mat:I DON'T WANNA GO TO SCHOOL TODAY!  
Zim:You'll get used to it!  
Mat:IMPOSSIBLE!Hey....where's my notebook!?!?!  
Zim:It was depressing anyway!  
Mat:I miss you......  
::RING RING::  
Mat:AHHHHH!::Ducks under table::  
::RING RING::  
Zim:It's only the phone!  
Mat:OOOOOO...::Picks up phone::  
Phone Guy Thing Man Person:CONGRATULATIONS!You've just won an all expense paid cruise through the BAHAMAS!  
Mat:Sorry,wrong number!::Hangs up::  
Zim:Who was it?  
Mat:Some human said we won a cruise thing!  
Zim:You mean....ummmm...one of those.....things....?  
Mat:Ya...you know!  
Mat & Zim:Heehee.....COMPUTER WHAT'S A CRUISE!?!?!?!?  
Computer:A cruise is a relaxing trip aboard a cruise liner ship.  
Mat:OOOOOO.....sounds stupid.  
Zim:But the humans consider this normal....we should have accepted!  
::RING RING::  
Phone Guy Thing Man Person:YOU'VE JUST WON AN ALL EXPENSE PAID TRIP THROUGH THE BAHAMAS ABOARD THE S.S.ILOOSMEELOONCHA!!!!  
Mat:OOOO...FAAAASCINATING....and where do I go to exept this cruise.  
Phone Guy Thing Man Person:Come to the hoopenderloonch port this afternoon and present your I.D.s!I have a list here that says Mr.Mat::Phone crackles::and a Mr.Zim::Phone crackles::!  
Mat:Thats us!We will be there!  
Zim:All we have to do is go to this port thing?  
Mat:Yup!  
At Dibs House.....  
Dib:OOOO....this is the beat mysterious mysteries ever!  
::RING RING::  
(A/N:Ya saw that one coming!)  
Dib:::Picks up phone::Hello?  
Girl Scout:HI WOULD YOU LIKE TO BUY SOME GIRL SCOUT COOKIES!?!?!?!  
Dib:AHHHH!::Hangs up::Whew!  
::RING RING::  
Dib:::Picks up phone::Hello?  
Phone Guy Thing Man Person:YOU'VE JUST WON AN ALL EXPENSE PAID TRIP THROUGH THE BAHAMAS ABOARD THE S.S.ILOOSMEELOONCHA!!!!  
Dib:Horray!Gaz,we,re going on a cruise!  
1 Hour Later At The Port....  
::Mat,Zim,Gaz,and Dib arrive not noticing each other::  
Mat & Zim:VIP!  
Dib & Gaz:VIP!  
1 Hour Later On The Cruise Ship....  
Mat:::SHUDDERS::No one said that there would be so much water!I think I'll walk down the hall for some fresh air!  
Zim:Me too!  
::Mat & Zim walk down the hall and see Dib & Gaz::  
Dib:YOU'RE HERE!  
Mat & Zim:AHHHHH!  
  
What'dya think?I liked it and I hope you did too!PLEASE EREVIEW!r&r! 


	14. Whoa....These Guys Are Stupid!

On The Ship.....  
Dib:....I knew there was a catch...  
Mat:Catch?  
Dib:A consequence to getting something free!  
Gaz:Actually....it cost 2$!  
Zim:Oh No...we're stuck here with DIB!  
Mat:Ohhhhohhhhhhoooooooooooooooooo....  
::Mat & Zim walk back to their rooms::  
Dib:My life is over...  
Gaz:ooooo....is that.....OH MY....IGGINS!?!?!?!?!??!?!??!?!?!  
Iggins:AHHHHH!IT'S THE GIRL THAT BROKE INTO THE HOUSE!Sick'em Rotsy!  
::A black dog runs after Gaz::  
Iggins:HA!I got a guard dog to protect me.....  
Gaz:Didn't the flyer say NO DOGS ALLOWED?  
Iggins:Oh yeah.....  
::Gaz gives the dog a death stare and it runs away::  
In Zim/Mats' Room.....  
Zim:What are we going to do?I can't believe this!  
Mat:AWWWW...cheer up...maybe something won't be hideous torture!And...if it is Dib is suffering too!  
1 Hour Later....  
Zir & Gir:::In disguise::YAY!We're gonna be SICK!::Barfs::  
Intercom:All the people dude thingies on the ummmm ::SCREAMS:: SHIP all like UMMMMM!! RePoRt toooooooo the deck.....That's ::Groans:: ALLLLLL!  
Mat:o.0!  
::Mat & Zim walk to the deck::  
Steve(Activities Manager):TODAY WE'RE GONNA STICK THESE COOL STICKS IN OUR CATS AND UMMMMM PULL 'EM OUT AN EAT 'EM!!!HEEEEHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!  
Barbara(Cafeteria Lady...or beast) :And then you can come to the cafeteria for some dog liver!  
::Mat and Zim run back to their room::  
Mat:What are we gonna do!?!?!?  
Zim:This is completely insane!  
Mat:Like me!.....  
Intercom:GUESS WHAT!?!?!?EVERY DAY FOLLOWING THIS WILL BE THE SAME!  
Mat:HOW WILL WE SURVIVE!?!?!?  
  
Will Mat and Zim survive?Will they suceed....NO......but read further anyway!Please review!r&r! 


	15. Professor Membranes Invention And Pizza!

The Next Day On The Ship.....  
Mat:THIS IS TERRIBLE!I can still smell that "dog liver"!::Groans::  
Zim:We don't even have any evil schemes or anything!  
(a/n:Hang on a sec guys!)  
Intercom:AHHH!::Groans::I'd like toooooOoOooooo greetyou on theshipfor....THE Morning annnnnouncements......::AHHHHHH Groans::.....today WEEEEEEEL have a new speciallllllll cafeteria THHHHHHING and well alsoooooooooooooooooooooo ::Groans:: have a surprize activityyyyy......AHHHHH!....::In a clear crisp voice::Thank you!This trip aboard the Iloosmelooncha is brought to you by PROFESSOR MEMBRANE and his patented URANIUM engine that we're using aboard the ship right now!.....AHHHHH! That weeeeeeeel be aaaalllllllllllll!!!!!  
Mat:That was oddly specific....  
Zim:Are you thinking what i'm thinking?  
Mat:Go get pizza?  
Zim:::Sigh::No.....we could steal the uranium from the engine!  
Mat:Ohhhhh.......Can we still get pizza?  
Zim:o.0'  
Mat:Wait a minute....if the ship can't move,how will we get home?  
Zim:::Pulls out two SHINY silver contraptions that are cylindrical::We'll use these handheld teleporters to get back to the base!::Happy grin::  
Mat:Cool........but what about the pizza?  
Zim:::Sigh::There will be pizza at the invaders convention when we conquer this filth ball....THINGY!  
Mat:Oh.....::Pulls out the handheld device from Mysrterious Mysteries::Wow...I didn't know this had tetris!  
Zim:You get more insane every day!  
Mat:Thank you!  
(a/n: I've seen every episode of IZ ever aired at least once!)  
Through the day,Mat didn't even flinch looking at the water or when Barbara served catgut because he knew what they would do at the end of the.....not so good...actually....kind of.....really bad.....day!  
In Dibs room...  
Dib:After that announcement earlier,I bet Mat and Zim are after Dads uranium engine!  
Gaz:Shut it Dib!Remember..........HORRIBLE SUFFERING!  
Dib:o.0.....well......i'm going out!  
Gaz:Whatever!  
::Dib slips out the door::  
In Mats Room....  
Mat:Are you ready?  
Zim:Yeah!  
::Mat & Zim slip out the door::  
  
MAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAA!I'm soooo evil!What will happen?Will anyone suceed?.....NO!But.....read anyway because the fist commands you!Please review!They mean so much to meeeeeee!r&r! 


	16. The Ending Of An Idiot Cruise And The Do...

On The Ship.......  
Mat:This is going to be great!  
Zim:Good thing we have Gir and Zir with us......wait.....  
Gir:Doooooom doom doom doom!  
Zir:Beeeeeeans beans beans!  
Zir & Gir:HEY!Doooooom doom doomie beans beans beans beansie beans beans doomie doomie doom!  
Gir:Lets call it the doomie beans song!  
Zir:YEAH!!!  
Mat & Zim:I really wonder about them sometimes!  
Where ever Dib Is In The Hall....  
Dib:Good thing I have a little insurance!::Holds up the uranium core::....I got it from the engine!  
Gaz:If you have the core,what's powering the boat?  
Dib:What?....Hey!How'd you get here?  
::Dib turns around and Gaz is gone::  
Where Mat And Zim Are In The Hall.....  
Mat:There it is!::Points to a blue door::  
::Mat & Zim walk in::  
Mat:HA!::Sees a fake core but thinks it's real::  
Zim:::Grabs the core::Hahahaaaahaaaaaaaa SUCCESS!  
Mat and Zim bide their time until the end of the cruise aboard the Iloosmelooncha.  
A Few Days Later At The Base.....  
::Mat and Zim are on the space station::  
Mat:Zim,you do the honors!  
::Zim inserts the "core" into the magenta tray.....BOOM!::  
Mat:Not again!I wasn't uranium!You can't go core!Not after all we've been through!  
::Flashback::  
::Zim takes the core out of the tray and Mat looks at it::  
Mat:I'll call you corey!  
::Time passes....BOOM!::  
::End Flashback::  
Mat:I was just getting to know it!  
Zim:You know.....you looked like a much better invader when I first saw you!  
Mat:That's how I got this job!  
Zim:0.o  
Zir & Gir:Doooooom doom doomie beans beans beans beansie beans beans doomie doomie doom!  
  
Yay!I finally updated!......You all knew they wouldn't succeed but if they did it would be an end to this fic!Anyway,PLEASE REVIEW!r&r! 


	17. Game Shows Of Doom!

Disclaimer:I don't own The Mole,Fear Factor,Survivor,or Whose Line Is It Anyway!  
  
At The Base.....  
Zim:I can't think of any plans right now.....I think my brain just stopped.  
Mat:I've got one!I've been waiting for you to shut up!  
Zim:Oooooo!GO AHEAD ZINBLOKSTEIN!  
Mat:We could get on Earthen game shows and use the money to buy Earth!  
Zim:Then.....  
Mat:Ummmm.....::Turns the T.V. on::......This one's called Fear Factor!  
Zim:Let's go try out for it!  
::Mat & Zim leave in Voot Cruisers::  
Later.....  
::Mat & Zim walk in covered in live snakes::  
Mat:At least we got in!  
Zim:::Groans::  
Mat:::Pulls out a piece of paper::I wrote down four game shows!Let's go try out for Survivor!  
::Mat & Zim leave once again::  
Later.....  
::Mat & Zim walk in wet and steaming::  
Mat:We're in two!Two to go!  
Zim:Now I have a stopped brain and squeedly spooch!::Groans::  
Mat:The next one is called Whose Line Is It Anyway!  
::Mat & Zim leave::  
Later.....  
::Mat & Zim walk in covered in little pieces of paper::  
Mat:Wow!That one was safe!  
Zim:I've got 300 paper cuts!  
Mat:The last one is called The Mole!  
::Mat & Zim leave for the last time::  
Later.....  
::Mat & Zim walk in staring blankly::  
Mat:That was a long repelling fall...  
Zim:Owie!  
Mat:WOW!We're in all the game shows!  
Zim:Whopee....ummmm...yeah.....  
Mat:Lets go to bed!  
Zim:My body Hurts!  
  
WOOOOO!The next four chappies will be certain gameshows!I'll go into DEEEETAIL!Well....what do you think?Huh?HUH?Please Review!r&r! 


End file.
